Grading The Devils Bottom 6

[00:00:05] Hey everyone, Mr. Devil here, Kenny Danico, three-time Stanley Cup champion of the New Jersey Devils, and you're listening to the Uncle Puckers NJD Podcast. Let's go Devils! Good. Easy on the ears. Much better. Slightly low. We'll figure that out at some point. I think that this is better than the loud. I mean, it was very loud.

[00:00:33] Very loud. It was kind of announcing we are coming. Right. We know. And for all the listeners, we have heard your feedback about that. We struggle with that too in our own headphones. Yes, we do. No PR, bad PR. What'd you guys get me for Valentine's Day? I get a great USA hoodie. Oh, thanks, dude. You're welcome. I do want to start. Happy Valentine's Day, guys, first of all. Happy Valentine's Day.

[00:00:59] I do want to start speaking to USA with the Four Nations, but before that, we are going to get our housekeeping out of the way now. And then I have a question for you that has to start with the USA's goal song. But first, this NHL season has been as predictable as a puck rolling on its edge. No one knows where it's going, but that just means there's time for your favorite team to figure things out. Except? Except?

[00:01:30] The Rangers. We don't want them to figure shit out. Oh, yeah. Come on, guys. Sorry. You said favorite team. I didn't realize this was interact with Ed. Sorry. All right. From now on, just shut up. Let me just start all the way. A start. No, I'm not. Your favorite team to figure things out and games left for you to get in on the action at DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NHL. It's super easy for first timers to get started. Try betting on something simple like picking a team to win.

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[00:02:55] NHL and the NHL Shield are registered trademarks of the National Hockey League. NHL and NHL team marks are the property of the NHL and its teams. NHL 2025, all rights reserved. DraftKings Sportsbook with code THPN. The crown is yours. Speaking of DraftKings, congratulations to DraftKings. They turned their first ever full year profit after 13 years. Good for an exam. And I think I contributed a decent amount to that because Timo Meyers is not scoring fucking goals.

[00:03:24] 13 years. 13 years. Yeah. 181.3 million in adjusted earnings for its first positive cash flow. I mean, that's like Uncle Pucker trajectory, right? Oh, yeah. 15 years. More profit. No doubt. All right. So then we got like 10 left? That's cool. I can retire from my regular job and then focus on all the income from this. There's nothing more than I would love. We're going to love a bunch of six-year-old Uncle Puckers 10 years from now.

[00:03:50] There's nothing that I would love more than to do this like as an actual full-time job. I love talking hockey. You just can't live on it. Chris, you would be an outstanding, outstanding game show host. You have a great way that inflection that you can do with your voice when we do like our games and stuff. It's pretty remarkable. Oh. Let's start there. You just as well. Wittingly like call games and shit too. Didn't you want like – weren't you into that at one time?

[00:04:19] You just would do it like for us like watching the game. But your mind could keep up with it the way like people call the games you have to do. I could never do that. Like the speed of which you got to get the names and remember different things about them and just the flow of the game. But yeah, he would mute the TV once in a while and do it. You know, we all play stuff. Yeah. So you'd be like – you'd be like his Danico. You'd be like, oh, oh boy. It's easy when, you know, you watch the same team all the time. Like it's easy to know all the devils.

[00:04:48] But like Bill Spaulding or any of these guys that do the play-by-play, like to know every single player. And some of these names are ridiculously hard to pronounce. And, you know, it is a really, really tough job. I think – Can Doc have the pronunciation book? He might have. Yeah. I mean, I would think that you would probably – I mean, I would probably be spending two hours before every game just going over, you know, with the index cards. I mean, they do. Yeah, I bet you do. They get there early.

[00:05:25] I would agree with you. But I don't know for sure. But, yeah, I would agree that they are probably watching mostly the monitor. And like once play is kind of moving and stuff and they kind of have a feel of who's on the ice, I think they maybe can let their eyes wander to the action a little bit more.

[00:05:55] But I'm with you because, I mean, there's a lot of times like Kenny Danico will mention something happening behind the play that maybe Spaulding isn't aware of because he's kind of following the puck and the play. And I think maybe Danico can easily watch the ice where – Sure. The guy doing the play-by-play has to, you know – But I don't know. I've never done it. It would be a great question for them if we can get him on. That would be a great question for Bill if he answered our tweet and said he's not going to. No, he's not going to. No, I know.

[00:06:25] He has better. Rachel, come on the show, please. Apparently Dan has better things to do too. And so, you know, it's not just Bill. It's even people that like us. Speaking of pronunciation, as we're all wearing our USA gear. Yes, yes. That Finnish team, like imagine trying to cram all those names into your head. I know, right? And just Yokiharu would give me a frigging heart attack, an aneurysm. Nice to think it's my new favorite hockey name though. After he scored that goal, I'm like, that's just a really cool name. That's a great name.

[00:06:55] So I want to start with the Four Nations. But before that, I have a question. I posed it to you guys earlier, but I'm going to say this because when we found out that Freebird is the United States goal song, I will say I absolutely hate that song. I am not a Lynyrd Skynyrd fan. There are so many tunes that you can pick that are much better than that. But okay, I digress. What are your guilty pleasures of music?

[00:07:20] Like, is there any band or bands or artists that maybe people wouldn't consider cool or whatever, but you got to pop them on sometimes? And when you do, you're extremely happy. Because I have a couple, but I want to start with Tim. Do you have any? Okay. So when we discuss talking about this, there are two different things. So there are two bands.

[00:07:48] If they were to come on, I will find them catchy and I will sing along with their songs. And I will proudly admit that that's Nickelback and Creed. Loser. I will sing along to that shit. Call me a loser all you want. But he did. Yeah. I didn't hear you guys. You're so mean. All right. So go ahead. Nickelback and Creed. That's it. Any, any, like any nineties kind of grunge era shit.

[00:08:17] Like I, I love like lithium on Sirius XM. Like that is not a guilty pleasure. That's my fantastic station. Like that's, that plays a lot of great music. That's the shit that was popular when we were in high school. And that's the stuff that we kind of grew up on. So I'm with you on that. Like, I mean, most of the stuff that's on lithium, I enjoy, but like, all right. There is, there is, there is another band that may permanently alienate me from this. No, you haven't heard mine. So yeah. All right.

[00:08:47] Florida, Georgia line. That's a country band, isn't it? They're like bro country, probably like the worst of the bro country, but holy shit, man. They have some songs like, like the song cruise that they have. It's just, it's so catchy. And about a Senator from Texas. No, it's about shooting guns at the moon and picking up chicks in a truck. Like that's what country songs are all about. So fun fact, you're not going to hit the moon. No, no, no. It's farther away than it looks. Yeah.

[00:09:16] You'd think. So yeah. So that, that would be my, my guilty pleasure. Now that I went first. I have a follow-up question though. So, okay. If Creed or Nickelback. Now I will say this. I can stomach an occasional Creed song. I cannot stomach anything from Nickelback. I find them repulsive.

[00:09:41] And I feel bad for Canada that they spawned them, but yet Canadians fucking love this band. So anyway, my question though. But Creed, like, like that, that Superbowl, it wasn't a Superbowl halftime show that they did. I'm not even sure. It might've been an NFC championship show. No, I don't think. Where they were Scott, uh, the, the lead singers in a Dallas Cowboys where he's in a Dallas Cowboys, uh, Jersey jumping around and they're playing higher.

[00:10:07] And there's a dude like in like, uh, doing the, the like ribbon gymnastics, like in the middle is when, when, when, when shows were, were pretty basic, but. Higher is an incredible song. Well, my question to you is, okay. They're guilty pleasure. Would you see either of those bands live? Like if they were coming around to your area. Oh fuck. Nickelback's playing. Like, do you got it? You have to go or no, you don't like them that much. Okay. No, absolutely not. All right.

[00:10:36] So, so Florida, Georgia line Creed and shitty back. That's your three. Okay. All right. All right. Bob. I know there are, and I know that like, at least from song perspectives, there'll be songs that come on from something way too douchey that I should never listen to that nostalgically. I'll probably sing and whatever, get all melancholy or some kind of weird shit. I know they're there, but I can't actually pick a full artist.

[00:11:05] Um, but do soundtracks count? Yeah. Yeah, sure. So anybody familiar with Streets of Fire? No. Michael Paré, who played Eddie and the Cruisers. Sure. I know who he is. Rock and roll fable. It was starring a young Diane Lane who gets kidnapped and Michael Paré's got to go fight. Who's the original goblin from Spider-Man? The Tobey Maguire. William Dafoe. William Dafoe. Nice ugly William Dafoe.

[00:11:32] So, yeah, and they have like this little rock and roll street battle, and it's a real corny movie that I love. And the accompanying soundtrack, it's definitely a guilty pleasure. And I can actually tell Alexa to put it on now. Like, I don't have to plug in my CD. I say, hey, play the soundtrack. I have to check out the soundtrack of Streets of Fire. Some of the songs are legit songs, but it's definitely a guilty pleasure. Like, is it original? Are they original songs? I'm not familiar with it at all. Well, I probably am.

[00:12:01] And it would probably, like, trigger something in the depths of my brain where I'd sing along if I... Yeah, there are definitely... Are we going to get a taste of it? No, we're not. I'm just... I mean, look, anything with Diane Lane in it is worth watching. I mean, she is so unbelievably beautiful. Eddie and the Cruisers, man. That was a great movie. It sure was. Both of them, my friend. Both of them. Please do not leave that. No, Eddie Libs kind of sucks.

[00:12:27] So there's Nowhere Fast by Fire Incorporated, Deeper and Deeper by The Fix. I don't know that. One Bad Stuff by The Blasters. Never Be You by Mariah McKee. Sorcerer by Marilyn Martin. Countdown to Love. You probably know that one. I don't think so. Tonight is what it means to be young. I don't know what it is, but I grew up watching the... I Can Dream About You, Dan Hartman. Yeah, okay. We know that song. So yeah, there's just... I don't know. Yeah, that's definitely it. I mean, the only other...

[00:12:56] I will put this on for my little walk that I do with my dogs in the morning. And you should watch the movie. I think I'm going to listen to it tomorrow. I might actually watch the movie tonight after this. It's great. It's great. So I have a bunch. Like, I do. I have a bunch of shit. Like, I mean, Bobby, you know me. You've known me forever. Like, you know, I don't consider Prince a guilty pleasure. I love Prince. I'm a huge Prince fan. Like, that to me, that's just great music. But Neil Diamond is probably my number one. I absolutely fucking love Neil Diamond.

[00:13:25] And I listen to him all the time. I do love him. Yeah. And, you know, I kind of go through different ones. But this artist I've actually been listening to at work quite a bit, Pat Benatar. I fucking love Pat Benatar. She's great, dude. Like, I mean, you don't realize how many amazing songs she had in the 80s. And then, like, you throw her on Spotify. And it's like, one great song after another.

[00:13:54] I'm like, man, why was she not more famous? Like, it seems like Pat Benatar should be a staple of rock. Like, because she kicked ass, dude. She was. I mean, she was a little bit before our time. But, like, if we were there in high school when she was at her peak. Like, what's the movie where they're like, there's one Pat Benatar. There's another Pat Benatar. I think it's. Legend of Billy Jean. I think it's Fast Times, isn't it? Fast Times, original high. Where they're like, that's one Pat Benatar. That's another. Am I thinking of somebody else? Oh, yeah.

[00:14:24] It's an actual, like, clip from the movie. But I think that's kind of 80s Pat Benatar, though. Yes. And I do. I dig Pat Benatar. But Neil Diamond is, like, my guiltyest of pleasure. That's a great one. We used to listen to that. And now this. Every now and then, Tim, you'll notice about me. I have these images in my head that I always got to verify with Chris that are real. Because they're so far-fetched. I can't remember what happened. The last conversation was that loop that can kill you at Action Park.

[00:14:53] And Chris confirmed we did, in fact, do that loop and make it through. That's fine. On one of the rare days that it was open and allowed to operate. So this one I think I might have even already asked you on this show, maybe when I first started it. But Neil Diamond, did we blast that in my Trans Am with the T-Tops off and an American flag on the Strip in Seaside? Probably. Probably. I mean, it was your idea? Wait, wait, wait. Take the T-Tops off?

[00:15:22] It had to have been coming to America, right? Yes. You had a Trans Am? You had a T-Tops Trans Am? Oh, my God. I have a car. Yeah. Get the fuck out of here. Guys, cover me for 30 seconds. I'll be right back. That's incredible. Did you have, like, long, flowing mullet at the time? Yes. No. By the time I got the Trans Am, I'd cut my hair short. But from 7th through 7th, 8th, and 9th, I was, you know, Metallica head, everything black t-shirt, long hair, curled up.

[00:15:48] And then I kept cutting it more and more until it kind of became a tail, which was never my intention. I was just so curly out the back. I was trying to get rid of the curls. And then one day I woke up and everyone was like, dude, you have a tail? I'm like, I don't have a fucking tail. Like, that's a tail. And then I just shaved my whole head. It was the first time I ever, like, shaved everything except for the top. So, yeah, I was there. I need to quote unquote burnout for three years. You need to get out. I need to see some pictures of this. All right. Like, I don't know what Bobby told you, but.

[00:16:16] So, 8th grade. Something about hand jobs and the wah-wah. Right. When Bob and I met. Backseat of the Trans Am. Now, I'll tell you, like, this is two people that probably should never have been friends. Like, especially, like, in 8th grade when, like, you know, everybody's into their cliques and what they, right? Right. So, my bus was late. 7th and 8th grade is the only time that Bobby and I ever took buses. We're not on the same bus. But.

[00:16:43] So, I walk into homeroom of 8th grade and I remember exactly what I'm wearing. Right. I have, like, a fucking bleached blonde, like, mohawk kind of thing going. I got these, like, baggy. Long. Yeah, it was long. I had, like, these baggy, like, checkered skater pants. Like, not skids, but they kind of were like skids. And I was wearing, I think, like, a. Fuck, I don't remember the shirt. But I think I had, like, a cardigan on, like, whatever, like, a t-shirt with a cardigan over it.

[00:17:13] My mohawk and my converse. And I come in, little skater kid. And she, the teacher tells me to take a seat. And I sit right between Bobby and our buddy Mark. And they were really close friends. Bobby has got a mullet. And, I mean, this was a fucking legit mullet feathered sides. Like, he's wearing a black Metallica shirt. He only owned black concert shirts. It was either ACDC, Metallica, or Guns N' Roses.

[00:17:43] Guns N' Roses. And Guns N' Roses. And skin fucking tight jeans. And I was, I mean, like. Skinny. That shit made, I mean, it made a comeback, skin tight jeans, like, over the last four or five years. But I think you were definitely on the cutting edge of that. Yeah. And, yeah. It would help if I wouldn't wear my jeans from sixth grade. Right. You know. Money's money. Just this burnout, you know, kid. And I sit between them. And for some reason, I don't know how, but we just, we became friends.

[00:18:13] And that was it. And slowly Bobby started, you know, getting more, you know, oh, I'm going to start, you know, surfing and skating a little. And doing all this other stuff. Right. And I just told Tim, it was by freshman year of high school that I was still. Oh, you were completely out of the boat. I was still burnout. I was still, freshman year, I was still black t-shirt. Were you? Yeah. Sophomore year is when I started to kind of reduce the flow of the long hair in the back by trying to get rid of the sides. Until I just told Tim we wound up, I wound up having a tail.

[00:18:43] And I was like, you guys are like, dude, you got a tail. I'm like, I don't have a tail. Like, no, that's a goddamn tail. So I was like, all right, cut the shit off. So by sophomore year, I'm completely cleaned again. I'm back to wearing all my surfer gear. But I did have that three years of very dark, very dark. But those are good friends. Be like, buddy, you have a tail. You got to get rid of the fuck. No doubt. And it was Mark who would cut it. That's your like, I'm going to be your friend for life. Yeah. I was really hoping that bus stop store is going to be like, I missed the bus.

[00:19:12] And then this eighth grader pulled up in a Trans Am smoking a cigarette. He's like, you want to ride? He did smoke cigarettes back then. And he did have his 85. That was a fucking cool car. Every morning, he picked me up when he got his license. He picked me up and we go to school in the TA. And man, we drove that thing down to Myrtle Beach. I mean, what's not Myrtle Beach? Cape Hatteras. Yeah, Hatteras. Hatteras, right? That's an outrageous car to have. Like when you're like, what were you like, 19? Yeah. Yeah.

[00:19:40] Well, my first car was a Trans Am. It was a four-cylinder Trans Am that only had three cylinders running. So that lasted about a year. That was junior year. And we got to park kind of on Raider Way, it's called, which is like right next to our school. We'd park and walk up the hill. And then by senior year, you park in the actual parking lot. And that's when I had the Trans Am. So he had a little bit of pickup. Gene Jackie opened it up. You're sitting on the hood. Oh, God. He was fucking like, you watch Billy Mattis. Yeah. When he rolls up to class.

[00:20:10] That's exactly what I'm dishing in my head. REO Speedwagon blasting. No. By then, actually, no. I was back to clean surfer look. So it wasn't quite the denim and all that. But the attitude was still there. Yeah. Yeah. It was incredible. That was awesome. All right. Now, let's talk four nations face off. We got to see all four teams. U.S. Looked really good last night. Curious what everybody's thoughts are. And curious of what you guys are thinking about tomorrow's games.

[00:20:39] Both of them. We got Finland, Sweden at 1 o'clock. And, of course, the one that everybody's excited for and talking about. United States versus Canada at 8 p.m. Bob, what did you think of the games? Well, mostly I watched, I mean, the USA game. And I was just, I'm so in it. That's why the jersey's on, dude. I just got into that really quick. Brady Kachuk. I mean, dude, just putting on a clinic. I mean, that guy is freaking awesome. I love seeing Jack and his wheels. But I just can't stop thinking, like, can we just get a freaking Kachuk, please?

[00:21:08] I'll take Keith at this point. I just give me a Kachuk on our team. I just, the way they elevate their game. I thought the U.S. looked really good. I'm really looking forward to the Canada game. I think it's going to be a bit of a brutal game. Should be awesome. Finland played all right. But, you know, I'll probably put my money on the Swiss for that next game. Yeah, well, they're not even playing. They'll probably beat Finland, too, the Swiss. Oh, yeah. I mean, and when he sure and Meyer are on that team, that's going to be awesome.

[00:21:38] He sure and Meyer are in, like, Turks and Caicos right now. Yeah, my bad. But, you know, I just, I hate, I hate the Kachuks. Like, even though they're playing for us and they're great. Like, first of all, I agree with you about Brady. Like, after watching that, like, last year, Tom Fitzgerald should have moved heaven and earth to get that guy in a devil uniform. It sucks that he's never going to leave Ottawa now. But I just can't stand them. I just, I don't like, especially Matthew.

[00:22:07] I don't like, I like Brady, I could tolerate him, but that fucking mouth breeder down in Florida, he just pisses me off. Even though he's on the U.S. team. I want him to do well in this tournament. And then, you know, I don't know. Just don't like him. Tim, what did you think of the tournament so far? Yeah. You know, I was coming into this, like, okay, I'm into it. I want to see these games, right? Like, I want to see these teams.

[00:22:32] You know, I personally think it kind of sucks that Russia is not involved, especially because it's an NHL-sanctioned event. It's not an IHF event. So, like, it doesn't have anything really to do with, like, international stuff. It's really just an NHL thing. But, you know, the big concern was, like, are these guys going to take this seriously? And from the drop of the puck and, like, just the way, like, the pregame and Mary Lemieux coming out, I'm frozen again.

[00:23:00] Mary Lemieux coming out. Just everything was done so well for that game. And the Canada-Sweden game was lightning fast. That was one of the, like, and Canada was all over them the first 10 minutes. Sweden kind of came back, got it back together, you know, came back, tied it. Like, Jesper got a nice little assist on the tying goal. But that was just a hell of a lot of fun to watch. And that Bell Center, I haven't been to a game in Montreal in, like, 15 years.

[00:23:29] I think, you know, went back when it was even, like, maybe even the forum or whatever the iteration was before the Bell Center. But that place was rocking. Like, it just looked like such an awesome atmosphere. I was like, all right, these guys are taking this fucking real seriously. Last night was a little bit more of a boxing match. It was a little slower, a little bit more sort of tactical. But then the U.S. team just exploding in the third period was incredible.

[00:23:55] I think, you know, the Finnish team, like, it kind of sucks that Heiskanen's hurt. And then they have one other defenseman, I forget his name, who's also hurt. So their decor is just totally decimated. And I think, you know, leaning on Barkov and Lundell and some of their forward depth to really help defensively. I think just it was a matter of time before the U.S. team was going to break through. And then, yeah, you know, the Kachuk brothers.

[00:24:21] You know, things aside, you know, like, I enjoy watching them play. Like, they're fun unicorn-type hockey players. You know, Brady is just such an animal. Like, he's just such an absolute animal. Same with Matt, too. So it's fun to watch. I'm into it. Like, this game on Saturday is going to be outrageous. Like, the ratings were really good for both games. I think 3 million people watched the U.S. game.

[00:24:50] That's impressive. Yeah. So, I mean, that's like a huge number for a hockey audience. So all in all, pretty successful so far. It's too bad Shea Theodore got hurt. Yeah, that sucks. You know, that's kind of been also the gripe about this is, excuse me, what if one of the star players gets hurt? But it's a Vegas player, so they've proven to have ways around that. Yeah. So, yeah. So I'm in.

[00:25:20] I'm going to duck out for a second just to get my video to work. Yeah, sure. And I'll be right back. Good. Yeah, I'm big into this. I love this tournament so far. I love the NHL. I wish they would adopt 10-minute overtime. Even the point system. Yeah. Now, how – but I would change it a little bit. But, like, I know that they would never do this because even, like, I think it was McKinnon came out saying, like, I don't want 10-minute three-on-three. Like, I was gassed, you know, going that long.

[00:25:48] But I would love to see – so if you win in regulation – and again, I don't – the NHL would never do this, but I would like this better. You win in regulation, you get three points. You play – if you're tied after regulation, right, you can each get – what was I thinking? No, I was thinking that – oh, I got to get him back in. Hang on. You're back? All right. Yeah.

[00:26:17] So I was saying that about the 10-minute three-on-three overtime, I really like that. But I wish that they would do, like, something like after regulation, you know, maybe everybody gets in the NHL, like, a point and then play 10 minutes three-on-three for the other point. And if you don't get – nobody scores, you just tie it. And everybody – each team gets a point.

[00:26:42] Like, I would like to see that over the shootout, you know, or something of that nature. So you're not doing a three-point swing like they do. You're still keeping it at two-point max. I mean, I guess you could do – I had it in my head before how it would work. But now I completely am, like, drawing a blank of how I wanted to do it. Like, three points to – three points if you win outright. But you have to make every game then worth three points. So maybe one point each for a regulation tie and then you play for two for the 10-minute overtime?

[00:27:13] Well, I think that's how it's – shit, we should probably know this. Well, two is a win in over – two points for an overtime win and one point for the overtime loss. So that's your three-point swing. And a clean win is three points. There's your three-point swing. Right, but there's nothing after the 10-minute shootout. So should that – No, tie. So that should just be one point each? Yes. That would just be one point. I'm down with that. I'm down with that. I wouldn't mind them moving to that scoring system.

[00:27:41] They're going to NHL rules for overtime in the championship game, right? Yes. I think it's five-on-five. They're going straight overtime. But I think, yeah, it's straight five-on-five overtime. You play until somebody wins. It's playoff style. Yeah, it's playoff style is what I meant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. But, no, I love this tournament so far. I mean, I thought that the Canadians were going to put 12 up, you know, the first few minutes into that game. I was like, oh, boy, this is going to get really ugly for the Swedes.

[00:28:07] But, you know, I think Canada, I mean, they came out with so much piss and vinegar, I just couldn't hold it up, you know. I do think the Americans are going to beat them. I think Sweden beats Finland tomorrow, and I think the United States beats Canada. And then Canada is going to be in a lot of trouble because I think it will be, like I said, Sweden and USA on Thursday night in Boston, where the national anthem probably won't get food. But, you know. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. I mean, I'm so tired.

[00:28:37] Boston. Here's the thing. Like, every reporter was asking the American players, like, how they felt about it. How about you throw the follow-up question up? Like, you know, do you agree with the reasons that they're booing? You know, because, look, I mean, you're asking them those questions. I think, you know, I mean, look, booing a national anthem is, like, the mildest form of protest that anybody can do.

[00:29:03] Like, people that are getting their panties in a bind over this, like, you know, stop, you little snowflake. They have legit reasons of why they're booing. And they're not booing America. They're not booing the Americans. They're booing a certain administration that, you know, they have a gripe with. So, I'm just – Yeah, so, it's interesting. They bring that up. And sorry to interrupt. I just wanted to – because there's this guy, Cam Robinson, who's a reporter. And he writes for Elite Prospects.

[00:29:32] So, he had kind of did what you did. He asked that sort of follow-up question. Oh, he did? In a different way. He said, I was texting with an American player who asked to remain anonymous. I asked how he felt about the U.S. anthem being booed. The guy said, don't love it. It makes you kind of cringe to see that. I then asked what he thought of the continued threats of annexation and the president calling the Canadian PM governor.

[00:29:58] Yeah, when you look at it from that side, I wouldn't like another country threatening to swallow up mine, especially one as big as the U.S. I'd probably do more than booing an anthem. Exactly. There you go. Which is exactly the context behind this that I think is needed. It's like, yeah, if I was Canadian, I'd be pissed about this shit too. Yeah, let's flip it around. The president –

[00:30:21] Every chance that the Canadian prime minister gets to get up there and shit talk us as a country and say that we're just basically another province of Canada and the president of the United States is a premier only. Basically, that's what – you'd be pissed. You'd probably boo their national anthem. This is our closest ally, both back in the day politically and geographically.

[00:30:47] The reason that America is so powerful and the superpower, preeminent superpower of the world, not to get in the weeds on politics and stuff, but a big part of it is because we are insulated by two friendly, gigantic countries on both our north and south border. And keeping good relations with those countries is one of the biggest things you can do for the safety of our country.

[00:31:12] So to see it going in the shitter over dipshits with no idea what the hell they're talking about, going out there like a certain president, saying the shit that he's saying, I'd be pissed too. I mean they do have a legitimate gripe. So I'm just – and like I said, booing something is the mildest form of protest. Like if you're getting upset about that, let's stop being snowflakes here. That's all. That's it. You heard it here first, Canada. No more snow.

[00:31:43] Well, man, apparently we're about to get crushed next week. So that's what it looks like with – I believe it will be soon. Yeah, I know. Last crush was two different – It would be like both of you guys promising your wives on Valentine's Day and be like, hey, we're going to get eight inches next week. You measure it three times. Then you show up with three. You're like, hey, you've got to fold it in half. All right. So what are we starting with, boys? You want to grade the bottom six or you want to play a game or should we keep the game until later?

[00:32:12] Let's grade the bottom six first and then hopefully we've got time for the game. All right. For people that – if you didn't hop on the last show, we did this whole graph thing with our top six forwards. And now we're going to do it with our bottom six forwards. So we have three separate graphs here. The first one is the players' stats from the 23-24 season. The middle graph is their stats up until now through 57 games.

[00:32:40] And the bottom graph is their projections from ESPN preseason, before the season started. And over here on the far right is like their projected points if they stay on pace. Why? Oh, man. This is the wrong one. Son of a bitch. Hang on, guys. This is the wrong one. I have to get the one that had Mercer on it. I thought that I had it. We might not be doing this right now.

[00:33:09] Give me one second here. I thought I had that one done. Mercer's no man's land. He wasn't in the top six. He's not in the bottom six. Like I said. I know, right? He has no role. What's his role? He doesn't have a role. I thought I had it, but I don't. I have the wrong one. Let me see here. Yeah, that sucks. I'm in favor of voting without Mercer, and then we could do a whole segment.

[00:33:39] It's great. Yeah, we can. I mean, I can also just give me two seconds and I can grab his numbers. Yeah, give me two seconds. I'll be right back. I'm going to grab his numbers so we can actually talk. I got his numbers right here if you want to project off. Okay, then that's perfect. If you're good. All right. So we'll start with, I had taken the ones I did this morning. I don't know why it wasn't saved, but I had moved Justin Dowling out because he didn't

[00:34:06] even have any projection from ESPN anyway. So I figure he's probably not long for this team, and I put Mercer in. When I did this, I just screwed up. So I had Eric Holla, Paul Cotter, Justin Dowling. It'll be Dawson Mercer. Nate Bastian, Curtis Lazar, and Thomas Tatar. We bitched and moaned a lot about our bottom six and how underperforming it has been. And so we'll just go through the stats from this season, right?

[00:34:33] Eric Holla so far has 45 games played. He has five goals, six assists for 11 points. He's a minus eight. So 11 points. He was projected to play 77 games, 15 goals, 21 assists, 36 points, and be a minus eight. He's actually dead on with the minus eight. Going on the projections of his path now at 11 points for the season, Eric Holla is projected to finish with 17.

[00:35:03] According to ESPN, he was projected to have 36. That is ridiculous. I mean, when we get to the grades, we'll talk about that a little bit more. And we got Paul Cotter, who's played all 57. I think that anybody would say Paul Cotter has been exactly what we kind of expected him to be 13 goals, six assists, 19 points. He is a minus seven, but he was only projected to first of all play 76 games and give us 25 points with seven goals and 18 assists.

[00:35:32] So he's already six points under his pace projected for the whole season. Right now, if he keeps at this pace, he'll have about 30 points for the season. Then you go to goals. What's that? And double the goals. Right. Now, Justin Dowling, he has played 39 games, two goals, three assists, five points. He had no outlook projected. So he is what he is.

[00:35:58] Nate Bastian so far has only played 39 games because he's always hurt because he's made out of fucking marshmallow fluff. Three goals, five assists, eight points. Nate Bastian is projected to play 54 games. He's only projected to have five goals, seven assists for 12 points. So on pace for right now, he's right there, 11 or 12 points for the year. Curtis Lazar, guys.

[00:36:25] This is, I'm just going to tell you his projected first. Projected to play 73 games to give us six goals, 13 assists and 19 points. That's what he was projected at. So far, Curtis Lazar has played 32 games. He has one goal, three assists, four points. At this pace, Curtis Lazar is going to finish up with six points. Jesus Christ. Then we go to Thomas. I'll be in coach.

[00:36:56] Right. Thomas Tatar, 51 games played, five goals, eight assists, 13 points. He's a plus two. He was projected to play 70 games. Give us nine goals, 15 assists and 24 points. And if he keeps at the pace he's at, he will give us 16 points. So that is our bottom six. And I think just by these numbers and their projected numbers, you can see how underperforming this team is.

[00:37:25] Now, let's throw Mercer's stat line in there now real quick. That's what I was going to ask you. Dawson Mercer has played 57 games. He has 13 goals and 12 assists, which is an even 25 points. He's a plus eight at his point per game production right now with what's left. He'd pick up just shy of 11 more points, putting him at 36 for the year. 36 points for the year. Right.

[00:37:55] Curious what he was projected at. Let me see if I can pull this up really quick. I hate that I didn't have the right one. I'm sorry. And again, this projection is strictly based on points percent that he's done so far. It's likely he'll wind up with more than 36. But that is what the math tells us right now. You sure about that? He'll have more? No, but any trade partners are listening to? Yeah. Oh, yeah. He's going to have way more. Yeah. Hey, Seattle.

[00:38:23] He's going to have 30 points in his last 20 games. Unbelievable. Better than McCann. You should just give us McCann one for one. Ron Francis, are you listening? Ronnie. Ronnie, can you hear me? Ronnie. Take the answer off our hands. Yeah. I'm actually kind of bummed that there hasn't been a trade yet. I was really hoping that that would get done. And throw the fish. Ronnie, can you hear me?

[00:38:52] Why is this not floating here? All right. So let's start our grades. Guys. Eric Holla. He's played 3C most of this season. We've talked about that being a position of need for the Devils. So obviously Eric Holla is not cutting it. 45 games, five goals, six assists, 11 points. He does do. I'll give my grade first. He does. You know, he's.

[00:39:19] You don't realize how good he is in the dot until we don't have him. And he's definitely needed. He does bring an element to that bottom six. He's not afraid to drop the gloves. He'll play a little physical. He can be an annoying little asshole. Played well, I thought, against the Rangers in the series two years ago. But as far as offensive production, I'm going to give Eric Holla, like, to me, he's just,

[00:39:48] he's a C minus right now. And I think that can move up if we get a 3C and drop him down to the fourth line. Because I think he, his production is much more akin to what a fourth line center would be giving you, not a third line center who should be. He's able to take on teams better lines. He's able to shut guys down. He's good defensively, good on the penalty kill. So for those reasons, I like Eric Holla.

[00:40:14] But for where his position is on the team right now and kind of what the team needs, it's like he should be driving that bottom six and he's a drag on it. So he's a, what'd I say he was? A C? C minus? C minus. I'm going to stay at that. So that's my pick for Eric Holla. What do you got, Bob? So I'm with you on a lot of his intangibles. I still like the man as a player, but I'm looking at this from the standpoint of you have been serving as our three C.

[00:40:43] And I believe that it is within reason to suggest that a three C in his position can get a point like every third game, roughly, which would forecast out to more like 27 points throughout the year. And he's on pace to come in about 10 points under that. So he's certainly not doing anything overly noticeable on offense. And I know he's good on the dot.

[00:41:08] I know he brings other things, but yeah, I couldn't give him more than a C for the body of work he's put in so far this year. And what about you, Mr. Tim? Yeah, I give him a, I give him a D plus. Okay. Um, he's just, he's, he's fallen off. Um, you know, well, he, he was injured for a little bit, which, you know, obviously cuts into that.

[00:41:36] And, and who knows if he was dealing with that, you know, for a little bit before he was hurt. And if that was, if that was hurting him or hurting his performance. Um, and I was trying to look it up and, and I don't have it in front of me, but I think his penalty killing time has been cut into a little bit, um, with the emergence of Jack and Bratt as a, as a penalty killing tandem. So that values kind of got taken off the table a little bit. Um, and I know Lazar and Bastion have been a pretty good penalty killing pair.

[00:42:06] Um, you know, the same thing kind of happened with Mercer, but I think they're kind of throwing them out. Um, third, he obviously has an extraordinarily extraordinary value in the dot. Um, you know, I think that's really important for defensive zone face-offs, particularly to ease some of the burden on, on Nico. Nico and, and you could see when hollow was out, Nico was getting, getting just a line chair of face-offs up and down the lineup. And I think taking that burden off of Nico for face-offs is actually a really important element for him.

[00:42:34] One thing I will say about hollow is, um, he, he just, he just strikes me as a guy that, that is very valuable to have in the playoffs. Just kind of that. And Bobby kind of touched on that. He's got that kind of a little bit of an edge. He's a bit of a prick, you know, he's, he's just a guy that plays well in the playoffs. And, and historically, his past couple seasons, he's really kind of come alive towards the end of the year and in the playoffs. You know, that same thing happened with 22, 23.

[00:43:03] Um, he, he really came alive, um, at the end of the season in the playoffs. So I think there's still some hope for him. Um, I do think that, you know, bumping him to, to the fourth line, to let him focus on being that defensive, um, face-off specialist center, um, that, that would be good if we can get a really good play driving center to, to come in and replace him at three C. But for now it's just, it's just not cutting it.

[00:43:27] And, you know, that, that three C I really still think is, is, is, is a major part of a team that, that wants to be successful. Yep. Totally. Yeah. And, and, and, and, you know, we need Eric Hall to be the best version of himself. And I think it's, I think it's going to come, I'm always the optimistic one where I think he's going to kind of find it and it's going to come alive, uh, once we, once we get back from the break. Yeah, I, I do. I feel the same way about you.

[00:43:53] I expect them come playoff time to, to be that pain in the ass that teams, other lines don't want to see on the ice. Um, him Meyer, I am reserving quite a bit for the playoffs before I can really judge them. All right. Paul Cotter. Um, dude, I love this guy. I love this guy. He can play anywhere in the lineup. Doesn't matter. He hits anything that moves.

[00:44:18] He's got filthy ass hands when he gets the, uh, a little bit of space. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, watch those things, Paul. Uh, I like everything about Paul Cotter and, uh, I'm going to give Paul Cotter a solid, I'm going to go B. He's a solid B.

[00:44:41] Um, especially considering who he was traded for or who he was traded, uh, with, with, uh, uh, Alexander holds like this team with Alex Holson. And I mean, we would be fucking pulling a little bit of hair that we have left out if Holt was still on this fucking team. So I love the move. I love that Holt is gone and Cotter's here. Um, another guy playoff time. I do expect him to step up. He knows what it takes to win.

[00:45:09] He's got a Stanley cup just a couple of years ago with Vegas. I love him. He's a B. I love Paul Cotter too. Um, I think we're definitely a better team with Paul Cotter on it. And given where his position is on the team, I think is 30 points is great. And I also think he's actually going to forecast way past that because he's shown us a streak before he's probably going to show us another one. I'm sure. Um, really looking forward to seeing a guy like that in the playoffs too. And he's a weapon if he's down there on the fourth line. I mean, he's legitimately could be third.

[00:45:39] He's played upper minutes too. He can do that. But for where he is on this team. Yeah. He's like, I really want to go B plus, but I got to be more realistic than that. So I'm with you. Just a solid B. He's a solid B player. Huh? Yeah. I'm the same. I, you know, solid B. Um, everything you guys said, versatile play up down the lineup. You know, he's a menace. He hits everything that moves. I think he does lack some hockey IQ. Um, and, and it kind of does take, take a little bit for him to get his shot off.

[00:46:09] Um, sometimes I feel like he gets caught in these moments where, where he just hesitates a little bit to shoot and it's a little bit annoying, but honestly, like, like he's still so young. He's still on an ELC. Like his deal is great. Like we have him for another year. Like this guy's going to be a pretty valuable member and his hands, man, like are, are incredible for a guy like for the, for a guy, for what he is like kind of a fourth line, third line grindy type of guy to have hands like that. It's just insane. Yeah.

[00:46:37] I don't think kind of realizes how many goals he can score. I just, I think his hockey IQ holds him back. Right. Of course confidence. Cause you think that he has rocks in his head. Yeah. Like I feel like he'd struggle and like, you know, he, yeah, he, he wouldn't be able to spell Rizzuto. Not getting him on anytime soon. Rizzuto? Rizzuto? Those are Z's. R-I-C-E-R-I-C-E. Is it Rizzuto Rice? No. Are you going to the mall later?

[00:47:08] All right. But anyway, I, I, like, look, I, you know, I don't, I don't want to kill the guy for that too much because he's not playing for a second line minutes, but he can in a pinch, which is, which is great to have. Like, like I think he's going to be a sneaky valuable guy. Come or come playoff time. I concur.

[00:47:38] Justin Dowling. Did you have something to say about, I just want to make sure that we do Mercer kind of in this segment of the bottom six before we do the next three. Cause I have a feeling it's going to go pretty sound. Okay. I was going to say Mercer for last, but let's do him now. Well, real quick, Justin Dowling, I'm going to give an incomplete only because I feel like this guy is not going to be with the team, you know, moving forward. Once some trades are made, like I do not see the playoffs having Justin Dowling on this roster. So I'm giving them an incomplete. I agree.

[00:48:07] I don't think he should really be up anymore right now. If he's on the roster, come playoff time, we're in trouble. And we'll grade them. You know, Dawson Mercer, like Bobby had said before he has played all 57 games. He has 13 goals, 12 assists, 25 points. Bobby said at this rate, he's going to get about 36 points. ESPN had him projected at 48 points.

[00:48:36] So even if with those projections with his pace, he's 12 or so points below that. He just got a new contract. It's getting about what? Four and a half a year, right? Something around there. Straight four, I think. Straight four, three years, I think. Right. So it's three by four. Yep.

[00:48:57] Um, look, Dawson Mercer to me is, um, has become nothing more on this team than a very valuable trade ship. And I feel like he, uh, is he's what we talk about it a million times. His board work is awful. I mean, this guy cannot go retrieve pucks.

[00:49:22] He is just, there's just so much about his game that I don't like. Um, I think he can, when he gets his shot, I mean, he's got a nice shot. He's got some good hands, but the intent, all the little things that everybody says shit about, like, you know, plot and stuff. Oh, he does a little thing. Like to me, Mercer doesn't do those little things. Um, and you said it right. Uh, Tim, the, his power penalty kill time has been cut into, uh, and these were the things

[00:49:51] that I thought kept him relevant on this team. And now we have other guys that are taking over those minutes and doing them more effectively. Dawson. I just, I see, I, we go into the playoffs and Dawson Mercer is still on the roster and we haven't traded him for a guy like Evans or Frederick or package him for the other guys. We talked about Raquel or, uh, Besser.

[00:50:15] Like right now, that's what Dawson Mercer can do best for New Jersey devils is be a part of a solid piece back here to help the team in the playoffs. I'm going to give Dawson Mercer so far this year. I'm going to give them a fucking D plus. Okay. Um, this is the most interesting one of all the ones that we've done so far, because there's

[00:50:41] a lot to unpack with Dawson Mercer considering where he plays, what the expectation was, his actual, um, contract salary to the benefit of what he's providing the team right now. He's legit kind of a third line guy. And by my math, if I'm looking at a third line winger with a reasonable salary, um, he would be over projection at a point, every like third game, that would be like 27 points.

[00:51:10] And he's more like 36. I still think he's an offensive threat to some degree. I think he's light as a feather on the boards. We get that. But with Dawson Mercer, regardless of where he's playing, I think the confidence in this kid, like if he got one big playoff goal, the game time goal or a game winning goal, I could see him getting like the game winner, the next, like two of the next three games in a series and just blowing up for a round. You know, it's not going to be a, you know, he seems like a kitten.

[00:51:39] You have a cat that sneezes like that? Performance. What kind of cat do you have that sneezes like that? Big cat. She has allergies. Leave her alone. Biggest cat you've ever seen. It's called a lion. You just went. I went over here to sneeze so I didn't sneeze into the microphone. I know. And we had one of the fancy microphones with a mute button. All right. I'm sorry. This thing came.

[00:52:09] It's like $10 from China. Right? China. Wow. Stock you put in the show that you got the $10 mic when Chris and I opted for the $20 mic. That's right. All right. So finish your Mercer thought. I mean, I'm basically done. I think that he offers more value than what we're seeing. He's a disappointment a little bit in his total production, but I don't think he's a waste. And I think if he's still on this team, like I said, he'll have some shining moments. He might get streaky here and there. His value for his contract is actually not that bad.

[00:52:38] So I'm not going to kill him. I'm going to give him like a C, maybe a C plus because he's a man without a role. All right. Tim? So I've thought about this actually more than I should be thinking about what I'm actually going to grade Dawson Mercer. It has occupied a little bit more of my time than I care to admit. But and actually, I kind of agree with a lot of what Bobby said in terms of.

[00:53:08] I think there's actually for his contract and the value we get for him, I think his production is kind of in line with where it should be. We want more from him a little bit more. Like, I think that 48 point projection is probably a little bit more, but the kind of general rule of thumb that I'd always use is a million dollars per 10 points. So that would put him right at that 40, 40 point, 40 point range. I think the issue and it's what you talked about, Chris, is the.

[00:53:38] He's supposed to bring this kind of get in the corner, dig the puck out a little bit of grittiness. And I feel like he kind of has somehow regressed into the opposite of that, where he's become a lot more perimeter and a lot softer and he bounces off of guys. He obviously didn't get the memo on working out over the summer and to get bigger and stronger. I still think there's some potential in this kid. And I think a lot of it has been that he's bounced around the lineup a little bit.

[00:54:08] And I think he needs probably a little bit more consistent of a line mate. Right. He's also not a not like a play driver. Like he's he's the ultimate passenger needs a play driver. And I think that's kind of why he and Timo work pretty well together, because where he excels is kind of in tight in front of the net with hands. He actually has a pretty good shot. I've had some problems with him not pulling the trigger on things. That may be a confidence issue.

[00:54:34] But I think if we do hold on to him and fit somehow kind of picks up that three C, whatever, whoever that becomes, you know, whether it is Evans or Donato or or even McCann. And we put McCann in a three C. If we get another play driving center to play with him and Timo, I think that'll do wonders for Dawson's game because it'll give him that role, those consistent line mates. And that kind of slots him pretty well. I would love to see that happen. Yeah.

[00:55:03] So like I don't like like I said this before, like I want to I want Dawson Mercer to succeed more than probably most people on this team because like I like him. You know, he's a homegrown product. You know, he was the kind of the I guess the salvation of a pretty shitty first round with Stillman and Holtz. You know, we had three picks in that or was it Mook Bedouin was the third pick in that draft. He's gone anyway. So, yeah. So, like, you know, are all those guys going to be gone?

[00:55:33] Like, that's not great. So I want to see Mercer succeed. But I think, you know, his contract is fair for what the value of him is. I just wanted to. Are you going to be a wing? If you're going to be a wing, you got to get better on the boards. You got to you got to be a little bit firmer on clearing the puck. You got to be a little bit firmer on the amount of times that he gets that puck on the right wing boards in the defensive zone and he just flubs it out or doesn't make a full effort to get that puck out of the zone or make a good pass. It just happens so often.

[00:56:02] It's incredibly frustrating. But all that being said, if he gets traded, hopefully it brings in a good piece. Ron Francis, if you're listening again, Dawson Mercer is amazing. You should give us Jared McCann for him. But so all that being said, I gave him a D plus. OK, so me and you are on the same page with the D plus. I thought you were going to go a little higher with that. Now, this is what concerns me, too, about Dawson Mercer.

[00:56:30] And Tim, you touched on it, right? Like he's supposed to be that gritty guy, right? Things concern me when he made this team for all intents and purposes. Every single devil fan, every reporter thought that spot was going to Alex Hulse. Dawson Mercer came into camp and took it. He just took it away. He did it through hard work. And that season, we saw something in this kid. Like, holy shit, who is this guy, right? He comes out of nowhere, beats Alex Hulse out for the job.

[00:56:59] And then the next year, he has the big year, 29 goals and everything like that. Now, you brought up the fact that you guys both said it. Tom Fitzgerald mentioned to this guy, like, you need to work out. You need to get bigger. You need to get stronger. It doesn't look like he took any of that advice.

[00:57:18] The one thing that I've always defended Alex Hulse with was anything that Coach Ruff or Tom Fitzgerald told him he needed to work on in the offseason or Dornbrick. He did. This kid did everything. He just didn't fit in with this system. I just don't think he might not be an NHL caliber player. He doesn't get the game. It doesn't get him, whatever. But he tried. Like, that kind of worries me about Dawson Mercer. Like, you even see Jack Hughes, you know, he's gotten stronger every year.

[00:57:48] Jesper Brad has. Dawson Mercer, like, why has he not taken that seriously? The regression from year to year to year is what worries me. And I don't have a problem with his contract. But, and maybe, like you said, if it's Jake Evans or, like you said, Donato or McCann in the middle of him and Timo, I'd love to see that if you can make that work. Because I like Dawson Mercer. I think Dawson Mercer has got hockey smarts beyond.

[00:58:17] I mean, he makes, I mean, seriously, put him and Paul Cotter together. You know what I'm saying? And, like, Paul Cotter would just be mush, like his brain capacity. Dawson Mercer is very smart. And he should definitely get into some type of analyzing or broadcasting or something after he's done playing hockey. But while he's playing hockey, I just need more from him. Like, the regression, all the shit that I mentioned. So, I just, I want to see him do good on this team because I like him.

[00:58:47] I want to see all these guys do good on this team. Yeah, like, I don't want to see this team fail. Like, I'm not actively rooting for any of these players to fail. I want them all to be better. But I think, you know, we need to be objective in where they are right now. And realistic, yeah. And with Dawson, like his, you know, progress is never linear, you know. And there is something to be said for coming to work every single day for the past three years. You know, that's... He's an iron man. That's a pretty good trait to have.

[00:59:17] So, I don't know. I want him to do better. I just feel like in an odd way, he's... Like, he missed his sophomore slump and he's making up for it. And I think that this might be the blip. So, it's interesting. A lower end blip that... I'm not saying he's going to be an 80-point scorer next year. But I think more of the rebound, like closer to what he was before than what he is now. Because this is quite low for a guy who had 27 or whatever goals it was.

[00:59:44] And I've been on record and I put a poll out there with a lot of our fans too about is he or will he ever be a 30-goal scorer. And overwhelmingly, you know, three out of four said yes. And I felt that too. So, maybe this is the blip, you know. Yeah, that could be. You know, in that 27... You know, I brought this up before. That 27-goal season, you know, was largely predicated on that one hot streak that he had that was outrageous. I think he even set a franchise record for goals in a row.

[01:00:14] He was almost about 40 goals. You know, is he that guy? Is he this guy? Or is he somewhere in between? And I'm guessing it's probably somewhere in between. I do think, though, that the next two or three weeks will tell us a lot or all of what Tom Fitzgerald thinks of Dawson Mercer.

[01:00:34] Because, you know, it will come down to if he does believe in everything that we say we would like to see him be, if Tom Fitzgerald believes he's going to be that, he's not going to get traded. And, you know, unless it's some whamble, like, over-the-top godfather type of deal that you got to get rid of him for this guy, then, you know.

[01:00:55] But if he does go to, like, Montreal for an Evans, like, if you trade Dawson Mercer within the conference for maybe, you know, I'm not shitting on Jake Evans. I'm just saying, like, I think that's a lot to give Montreal the potential, the idea of, and I've said this, I used to say this all the time about Alex Holtz. The idea of Alex Holtz is a lot more appealing than what Alex Holtz is. I'm kind of that way with Dawson Mercer, right? Yeah, and I don't, I would never put Mercer in a deal for, like, a Jake Evans or a Donato.

[01:01:24] Those are second, third-round picks. You know, that's the extent of what those guys are worth. And that's probably overpaying for those guys because of the way the marketplace is shaking out. If Dawson were to get traded, it should be for one of those high-line Raquel, Besser, McCann type of wings. And I think that the leash is going to be short coming out of the break. I think it's, here you go, no more excuses, guys. For most of you, you got a nice break. You got out of your system. Went down the aisle and you partied, do whatever the fuck you want to do.

[01:01:53] It's back to business. Like, you got to show it now and you got to show it quick because we got to write this shit for spring, like, soon. So this is it, right? They got to, like, just break through the tape as soon as the season starts back up. Yeah, no more of this. We're learning. We're still growing this team. It's like you're fucking done with that. You're either going for a copy or not. That's it. Yeah, I agree. 100%. All right. Let's blow through these last three. All right, we got Nate Bastian.

[01:02:18] Right now he's played 39 goals, three, I mean, 39 games, three goals, five assists, eight points. Projected for 6-13-19. Right now he's, I'm sorry, that was Lazar. 5-7-12 is his projection. 11 points is what he's projected to get. So, yeah, he's right there. ESPN had him with 12. We got him at this pace going. He'll get an 11. Nate Bastian, fuck.

[01:02:45] There's not many guys on this team that I'm really just don't give a shit about. Nate Bastian's one of them. Like, I feel like for a guy as big and tough as he is, like, he gets hurt way too much. He doesn't, he's not as physical as I'd like to see him. He is occasionally. And when he does, you're like, all right, Nate, there you go. And, you know, that, when he plays that physical edge, he does kind of seem to get more offensive chances. Now, lately, the fourth line I thought has been playing better the last couple of games.

[01:03:15] And I thought Bastian played really well. For what Nate Bastian is, he's a fourth line winger. He's big. He's, you know, when he plays that physical game, I like him a lot. I, like I said, he's a dude that I don't think about a whole lot. But all in all, for what he does on this line, Nate Bastian's a B- for me. B? Wow. B is a B-.

[01:03:44] B isn't there. But not that bad. Okay. B as in Bobby. Ooh. Oh, ew. You're up, Bobby. What a B. Nate Bastian is nearly invisible to me most of the time. He, I'd like to see him approaching at least kind of that 20-point mark, even though he's a fourth liner. I think that at his salary, which is not huge, this is just kind of nitpicking at 1.35.

[01:04:10] You can literally slice that in half and bring up kind of anybody at 750. Um, I just don't know that there's any Nate Bastian effect that can't be duplicated by like literally anybody. And I, I expected a little more from him. So this will be my harshest grade to date at a D plus. Wow. Okay. Tim and. Oh, Nate. Nate, Nate, Nate. Um, I give him just a flat D.

[01:04:40] Um, you know, I, I don't know if I'm being too harsh, right? Like, like you said, he's a fourth liner. That's his job. That's always been his job. He's not particularly fast. He doesn't really kind of do much. He's a good penalty killer. Um, I'll give him that. And he's good defensively, which I don't know. Is that all we want from him? I don't know, but like when he does go in and four check, he's a sloppy four checker.

[01:05:08] He he'll go in to hit the defenseman and he'll fucking totally whiff. Won't get the puck and the puck will just come right out. Like he doesn't, he doesn't four check very well. Um, like what should be part of his, part of his skillset is being able to get in, disrupt that D get on the D. Jesus Christ. That's just a bad mind. Oh, cause you done like dick. I get it. Yeah. Yeah. Just bastions all over that D. I get it.

[01:05:37] Pumping that D just rubbing up and down that D. Um, that should be, that should be a good part of his skillset. And it's not, you know, I'm not necessarily killing him for his production. I'm killing him for the role that he's supposed to be. And for a guy that's six foot to 10 or six, four to 10, like the amount of times that he gets absolutely obliterated. Like, like, come on, man. Like pick your head up. Like that's one-on-one shit. Like, I don't, I don't understand how much he gets killed.

[01:06:05] So I don't know. I feel like he, he's someone that could be upgraded. I don't think he will be. And, and is a below average fourth liner. So D. I would like to amend my B minus. Cause I, no, no, no. I, I, I stand by absolutely what I, what I said. No, I, I stand by what I said. I'm going to give him a, now he's just a solid C right now. And because of two things that you guys said that kind of swayed me, Bobby, when you said, you know,

[01:06:34] I can see anybody else from Utica coming up and being able to do this job. And I thought Nolan foot was the first one that popped in my head. One reason why you can't do foot. Exactly. And I thought if we had Nolan foot, I think Nolan foot would be considerably better in that position than Nate Bastion. So for that reason, I mean, like I was looking at it, like he's a fourth line winger. Like you can't expect too much from a fourth line winger, but then Tim bringing up his size and the fact that like he can play physical.

[01:07:04] And we've seen it. He can, you know, but he does, whenever he does get a big hit, he's fucking out. You know, whether it's, you know, getting his jaw busted in Calgary, the hit he took. By a guy who was five foot nine, by the way. By a guy who was five foot nine. And, and, you know, I'm with you. So I'm going to give him a solid C. If Nate Bastion was part of a trade package, I think it might make the doubles better. So I'm going to amend that too. In a cap crunch. In a cap crunch.

[01:07:33] That $500,000 difference between him and foot. At the trade deadline is a $2 million player. There you go. You know. So, and one, one last ad about Bastion. This I just find actually kind of hilarious. Cause I think it lines up with everything that we're saying. His, his expected goals for different, or his difference between his expected goals for and his expected goals against is zero. So meaning like, meaning like he just, he's just kind of there. Like nothing good happens. Nothing bad happens. Really? He's partially.

[01:08:03] It's, it's going. It's, he's just there. Yeah. He's partially when it's on your plate, you're like, Oh, look, that looks nice. But you never say that when it's not, cause you just don't fucking miss it. You push it aside for the state. And if there's one thing we've all always done on this show is if you are a player of size and you don't at least use it to a reasonable level for your skill, we're not seeing a guy go up there and beat people down. That's a big problem. That's what we hated about Kevin Ball.

[01:08:33] That's exactly what we hated about Kevin Ball. Yeah. Yeah. Like he should be like, he should have the, the mystery Alaska tree speech was like, you're the big guy. Like you can kill people. Yeah. But, but like he misses people when, when he goes in to hit him and like watch the next game. Next time he goes into four check, he'll go in flying and he'll just absolutely miss the guy. And it blows my mind. All right. We're going to move off shitty. Nate bastion is getting a little late and we have so much time. It's just a little to do reverse it.

[01:09:03] Curtis Lazar, 32 games played one goal, three assists for four points. He is projected to have six goals, 13 assists for 19 points. If he keeps up the pace he's at right now, Curtis Lazar will finish the season with six points. Curtis Lazar was brought here, uh, traded for, okay. Tom Fitzgerald saw something in Curtis Lazar.

[01:09:27] He liked, and I think the things that he liked was his grittiness, his toughness, his able, his ability to get in front of the net, to score greasy goals, to be that kind of, uh, I don't want to say unsung hero, but more of like that. Um, that little chip that, you know, no other teams don't kind of take a account of. Like you never think about Lazar winning a game in overtime, you're not preparing for him, but he's going to be that guy that does it.

[01:09:56] What we got this year from Curtis Lazar is a flat out F for fuck Curtis Lazar because yeah, I cannot give this dude anything better than an F. He's been invisible this year provided nothing other than hanging out with Amanda Stein during the fucking thing that it did, whatever it was, the devil's youth foundation. Yeah. Yeah. The sweep the deck thing. Thank you.

[01:10:22] Other than hanging out with her and being mildly funny and, and, and just, you know, seems like a great lovable guy. I don't fucking want him on my hockey team. If this is what Curtis Lazar is, I am so just more disappointed in him than almost any other player on this team. He gets an F. I hate this one because I love laser. And speaking of salaries, he's only a million. He makes 350,000 less than Bastion.

[01:10:52] And I know in hockey terms, that don't mean shit, but think about our lives. 350,000 less than another guy that we just said is completely shit. Yeah. But in, but in respect, Nate Bastion has double the points as Curtis Lazar right now. Right. If, if, if Lazar were on his, Oh yes, he does. And pace of 20, that's perfect for where he is as the fourth line center, assuming he's bringing in all those other intangibles that we loved about this guy last year.

[01:11:21] But he hasn't done anything. And I just, I really don't think I can actually give an F. So I'll have to go D minus just to save some space. I really, I want to go F, but I'm going to go. I'm going D minus. So you're just passing him on to the next grade, to the next teacher, just to make it his, make it that teacher's problem. Exactly. I can't commit. Guy can't fucking read and you're just passing, you're just letting him graduate to the next level. So how? D minus is pretty bad.

[01:11:50] If you get D minus on your driving test, you don't get a license, right? So it's, you know, it's bad. Are you keeping Curtis Lazar back for another year, Tim? No, no. I'm giving him an F plus. He said you're keeping him back another year. No, no, F. Yes, he failed. F. As in fuck this guy. F. Curtis Lazar, the only reason I'm giving him a plus is because he's so goddamn funny. That is the only reason why.

[01:12:18] He's an incredible person. The only reason I didn't give him more than an F plus is because I haven't seen enough video of him roasting Luke this year. I have not seen enough of him busting Luke's balls. Listen, he is. Curtis has only played like 32 games. So I got to give him some benefit of the doubt there that he might pull his shit together. I hope so, man. He's the worst forward we have on this team. And it's by a lot. And I could give you actually the number for that.

[01:12:47] So that same number that I said with Bastion, the expected goals for versus the expected goals against. He's at a negative 6.8. That's second worst on the team. There's a guy that's worse than that that we can get into when we talk about the defense. The next closest forward is Dawson Mercer, who's .3. So he's six goals, six and a half goals worse than the next closest forward. He is not a 4C.

[01:13:16] He's a bad hockey player. He is the reason why we need a significant bottom six upgrade. Because if you slide Hollow into that spot, and then we get someone better. Even if we get someone better than Lazar and leave Hollow at 3C. Like, he's the guy that really needs to get upgraded. And I think you slide Hollow down into his spot. That is an immediate upgrade. I hate to say it because he's such an incredible guy. And so awesome.

[01:13:44] But that doesn't get you very far. This is a what have you done for me on the Ice League. And I'm sorry, Curtis. You're the best. I hope you don't listen to this. I won't worry about that. You stink. You stink. F plus. All right. Then, okay. I think anybody else have anything else to say about the laser? Final one. Let's go. All right. Tomas Tatar. 51 games, five goals, eight assists, 13 points. He's projected 70 games, nine goals, 15 for 24 points.

[01:14:14] And then this rate, he's going to probably end up with about 16 to 17, 18 points below what he's projected. Tomas Tatar was brought back here for some God unknown fucking reason to, I guess, rekindle the magic of two years ago. I'm much more into recency bias. And I would like to just look at, you know, you look at his numbers from last year where he had nine goals and 15 assists and 24 points.

[01:14:42] Thomas Tatar is a shell of what he is, what he was. But the guy does show little glimpses, right? He can score some fucking goals where he works his ass off. And, you know, he, we've seen that this year. Not a ton, but we've seen it. So I think Tomas Tatar on the fourth line is where he belongs. I think if you upgraded the center position or you had Holla down there, I do think you'd get much more production out of him.

[01:15:12] He's not a top six guy. He was brought in here. If those were the reasons to play with Heischer again, it was the wrong reasons. He gets paid, what, a million and a half or something? One eight. One eight. Two. So, I mean, I don't think this team really misses a beat. Again, like you said, Bob, if you have any kids down below that can come in for, you know, no money and give you that kind of production.

[01:15:40] So Tomas Tatar for me is, I guess, around a D plus. I'll give him the plus, but that's where I'm at with him. Tatar was a shot in the dark. Tatar was our team's mostly filled. We can always use another veteran guy who won't let you down most nights. Maybe he rekindles the fire with Heischer. Maybe he doesn't. And if he doesn't, he's probably going to be extremely serviceable on a lower line and give you everything that you'd expect from a veteran.

[01:16:10] But given his salary compared to some of the other grades we're given, his production, landing at maybe 16 points, I think even on the fourth line, he should project to more like 25 to 30. So he's off the mark for that. He's supposed to give a little more as a veteran calming influence, although I do agree with you that every now and then he does come up with like that big goal or a big moment. But overall, it's not working for him this year. I'm going to give him a D.

[01:16:40] All right. Damn it. Give him a C. He was brought in, you know, like Bobby said, just kind of on a flyer to be a veteran guy. You know, they tried to recreate that Mercer, Nico, Tatar line and that just didn't work at all. He's been a trooper about moving up and down the lineup. He has been saddled with Lazar, who's a pretty bad player.

[01:17:05] And I think if you move hollow down, like maybe that'll help him a little bit more. He is a notorious playoff ghost. So I'm hoping that that I think that he's a very easily upgradable piece and I won't miss him one way or another. But I think he's been a pretty serviceable guy. And some of those hardworking goals, like you see that, like you're like, yeah, hell yeah, Thomas. Like that's a good, good hardworking goal. Good job. But let's see. Yeah.

[01:17:34] If we average and we didn't, but if we average the grades of all the bottom six, I think they would probably come in definitely well below average. Yeah. Yeah. We're just, they do need to upgrade there, but. All within range with different peaks and lows, but. Right. Meeting in the middle there, you get the picture. It's a, it's a bleak picture, unfortunately. Yeah. So Fitzgerald has his work cut out and he needs to upgrade him. We talked ad nauseum.

[01:18:02] Strength going into this season, man. I wrote about it. I was like, I was so excited about the bottom six more so than the top because you knew what you were going to get from the top and the six just looks so promising. The bottom six. I'm with you. And you know, he's got to do some work. He's got to upgrade the next time. We're going to, before the season starts again a week from tomorrow, we're going to do the defense. And I think that we should, we don't have any numbers, but I think we should do the goalies real quick.

[01:18:32] Jacob Markstrom and Jake Allen. They're an A. Enough said. Anybody not say an A? No. A and A. Tom Fitzgerald absolutely nailed it. I mean, that's so huge. When you see that, like we had such a problem last year with goaltending. And you look at what he went out and got and how these guys have played. It's like, man, we couldn't ask for anything more. So much so that we've had a lot of talk about the fact that, okay, this is Allen's last year. So natural progression is next year.

[01:19:02] We got Markstrom. We'll bring up the next kid up to kind of fill that line. Then Markstrom's gone. Who's going to show up and be the next kid? I'm thinking each of them get extended another year or so. We can delay that plan. I have no problems giving Allen another year. I mean, Markstrom we already have for a year. And if Dawes isn't ready and Malik isn't ready and Poulter's not ready, give Markstrom another year and then, you know, keep it going. Keep it going.

[01:19:30] Do you guys want to do WNO or save it for next time since we're already an hour? We should probably save it. All right. We're going to play that again next time. So we're going to wrap this thing up. Thanks a lot. Let us know what you guys think. If you're watching us on the YouTube channel, you know, subscribe, whatever, if you're listening to us, download, subscription, five-star review, all that other bullshit, guys.

[01:19:56] And, yeah, so, again, let us know what your grades would be for the bottom six. Really curious what you guys, the listeners who are much smarter than us, would think about that. So they can get their own channel. Mostly. Come on, guys. It's okay to flatter them once in a while. Oh, they're definitely smarter than us, or at least me. I mean, I'm good with that. Tim and Bob, I'm Chris. We're the Uncle Fuckers, and we will see you when we see you. Bye-bye. Thanks, guys. Happy Valentine's Day, Pelican.

[01:20:32] It's over, Johnny. It's over.